Hi,
This website has been a long time coming. For many reasons, I never made and/or found the right time – there was always a work, family or other commitment that came first. I kept thinking “I’ll do it one day” and ‘one day’ never came. As time passed and I got older, it occurred to me maybe it never would.
Thankfully, one day did come. And I’ve been fortunate to have the capacity and opportunity to setup VLVLV i.e. Evolvelove. And now, finally, is the time to send you this email. I’m doing with the hope Evolvelove will help reduce the suffering I witness in the world, because I believe enjoyable, informative and inspiring conversations are the most powerful lever we have for creating change.
Now an assurance… I’m not asking you to buy anything. All I’m asking for is a 15-minute conversation. And another assurance – I won’t ask you to buy anything in that conversation either.
If you’re thinking “this is taking a while” – I’m hearing you. Our time together need only be as long or short as you choose to make it. A great thing about reading is you have 100% control over when to stop. No hard feelings if/when you do… I’ll even offer you ‘press eject’ buttons along the way.
Got to go? All good… we’ll catch up later.
THE FIRST STEP IS A CONVERSATION
A common theme on this website is that enjoyable, informative and inspiring conversations are the most powerful lever we have for making the world a better place. I realised this after thinking back on some major events and/or achievements in my life e.g. school, uni, work, relationships, children and family. Pretty much all of them started with a conversation. That said… it actually took someone else to shine a light for that realisation to occur and I encourage you all to look up the wonderful work of Dr Renee Lertzman:
“Having conversations is the driving force for any kind of change… conversation is the most powerful lever for behaviour change… behaviour change really comes out of human interaction and conversations”
Dr Renee Lertzman
Conversations are the most powerful lever for behaviour change.
TAKE THE FIRST STEP AND BOOK A CONVERSATION
I’ve experienced the power of conversation to create change many times.
I was a firefighter for 10 years, during which I attended a fire in which a house burnt down. It turned out the cause of the fire was most likely a laptop left on a bed. I literally got home from that fire, walked past my daughter’s room and noticed she had gone to school and left her laptop on the doona. When she got home, I shared the story about the house fire I’d been to that day and the danger of leaving laptops on beds. Fair to say she didn’t seem to take much notice! Fifteen years later, I visited her at a house she was sharing with 3 others:
“Do you remember the story about the laptop and the housefire?” I asked
“Of course”, she answered.
“So, if you were leaving for work tomorrow morning and noticed your housemate had left a laptop on their bed… what would you do?”
“I’d go in and put it on the desk”, she answered immediately.
So a conversation she barely seemed to hear, may have prevented a fire fifteen years later.
Conversations travel faster than the speed of light.
TAKE THE FIRST STEP AND BOOK A CONVERSATION
After being a firefighter, I set up a drink driving program and we offered people free alcohol breathtesting at events such as Splendour in the Grass and Falls Festival. Although, truth be told, the breathtester was simply a tool for initiating conversations. Because it was in the connections and conversations that the real work was done e.g.
“Are you driving home?”
“Yep”.
“How many drinks have you had?”
“Haven’t counted.”
“What do you think your BAC is?”
“Dunno… reckon I’m under though.”
Once we’d made a connection, we’d have a conversation… about standard drinks, alcohol absorption, counting drinks, and other ways to get home. Simple stuff. Evolvelove is based on the same model i.e. making connections, having conversations, sharing something helpful with others, &/or learning something useful for ourselves.
Speaking of which… how about we make a connection and talk over a drink?!
After COVID did in that gig, I worked in road safety education. Ten years on I’ve become even more convinced that conversation and connection are at the core of behaviour change. I remember a session I did with a group of learner drivers. I shared a story about a family friend – a young P plater who, 3 weeks after getting his licence, was caught doing 220km/hr coming back from McDonald’s at 2 am with four mates in the car. As I told the story, a group of guys at the back of the room started laughing:
“Hey fellas… what’s so funny?” I asked.
“He was in that car!!” they said, pointing to their mate.
I asked the young guy.
“So. It’s 2 am and you’re in the back seat of a car doing 220km/hr. The driver has only had his licence for 3 weeks. How did you feel?”
“I was shitting myself,” he said.
“What did you do?”
“I didn’t have a seatbelt on. I pulled it out and wrapped it around my arm coz I couldn’t click it in.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?” I asked somewhat incredulously.
“Coz everyone else was having a good time…”
Over the years, I’ve heard many variations of the same story. It became clear many people were not saying anything in unsafe and challenging situations.
Do you have a story about speaking up in a challenging situation?
THE FIRST STEP IS A CONVERSATION
Whilst working in road safety I got to thinking about the bigger picture. And as much as I was grateful to be doing meaningful work, it was when I looked at the death, injury and suffering from conflict, inequality and climate change that I felt I was putting a bandaid on a broken leg. And again, someone else helped me see the obvious. This time it was David Suzuki…“
“We’re in a giant car heading towards a brick wall and everyone’s arguing over where they’re going to sit.”
David Suzuki
There was a common thread between facing threats on the roads and facing existential crises. People, including myself, were generally not talking about them. I would go to parties… and away on weekends… and catch up with my family. And I was like the young guy in the back of the car doing 220km/hr i.e. I wasn’t saying anything because everyone was having a good time. I didn’t want to be the ‘fun police’. I didn’t want to be the voice of doom. Until I realised it’s not Either/Or
We can talk about big topics AND have enjoyable, informative and inspiring conversations.
TAKE THE FIRST STEP AND BOOK A CONVERSATION
Which brings us to now. I started Evolvelove, a profit-for-purpose organisation, to have enjoyable, informative and inspiring conversations about crucial topics. Our NEXT LEVEL CONVERSATIONS are small group conversations focused on crucial topics. They are facilitated, real world (or Zoom) conversations in which everyone gets 5 minutes to share their thoughts, feelings and experiences about topics such:
- Peace in Ukraine & Gaza
- Climate Change
- Wealth Equality
- Driving the Change
- Sustainability
And just a heads up… Next Level Convos are less about the topic and more about how we connect and share stories with each other.
Thanks for making it this far and I look forward to having a conversation.
Phil
Founder Evolvelove